What I Learned This Year Coaching Wedding Businesses

Transcript: What I Learned This Year Coaching Wedding Businesses

Heidi Thompson:
Hey friend. Welcome to the podcast. I am your host, Heidi Thompson and I am all about helping wedding pros like you book more weddings with clients that you really love working with and also have freedom and flexibility. Because nobody cares how many weddings you booked or how many weddings you work this year if you hate your life because you have no freedom. And I wanted to record an episode for you today that feels a little bit more reflective. I’ve been thinking about over the past year what has actually moved the needle in my business and what has made the biggest difference for my clients, who are all different types of wedding pros from around the world. Some surprised me, some were a little uncomfortable, some were not a surprise at all, and some felt almost a little bit too simple.

But they did keep showing up time and time again. So I want to walk you through the biggest lessons from this year, starting with my own business and then sharing what lessons I learned from working with wedding professionals this year. And you’ll you should be able to take all of these and apply them to your business or at least learn something. Get a little nugget that you can apply to your business. So the first in my own business was really reinforcing the power of following a proven path. It saves so much time and money and creates focus. And I was really looking at every time I have paid someone to learn how they’re doing something, how they figured something out to get support from them, it has always been worth it. I have never not gotten an amazing return on investment from it. Every time

I’ve tried to reinvent the wheel, I’ve tried to figure everything out on my own. It took longer, it felt more overwhelming, it felt heavier. Every time I followed a structure that already worked, things moved so much faster and easier and felt calmer. This was a really good reminder that needing guidance or wanting to follow what someone else is doing, wanting to be a student of someone, doesn’t mean that you’re not as far along as them, that you’re not failing. It usually means you’re being really smart with your time. So I have invested into multiple, you know, coaches and programs and every single time I’ve bought back time. I’ve bought speed. I’ve bought the ability to do something more easily. And those investments have been so, so worth it.

So speaking of return on investment, it was really reinforced for me that in my business, and this may be different for other people, but in my business, ROI matters more than visibility and ego. I had a few people who I love collaborating with, you know, just mention that they were speaking at certain things or going to certain events and asked, you know, am I going to be speaking there? Why don’t I speak there? Which I’m totally fine with sharing that. And I stopped saying yes to everything everywhere and really focused in on the roi. So you may not know this, but a lot of events in the wedding industry, a lot of big conferences don’t pay their speakers. So I need to be able to get a return on investment in some other way. And I. I also run two large online events each year. I run Book More Wedding Summit and Wedding Business CEO Summit. And we have, you know, four, five, more than 5,000 wedding pros that attend that. I have found way more success focusing on that than trying to put myself on everybody’s stage.

And I’ve also really learned about myself this year that I have this really annoying tendency to get sick every time I’m on a plane. Last time, thankfully, that didn’t happen. But before that, man, it’s like every single time I’m on a plane, I get sick and I’m out for like an additional week. So if I’m going to a conference that’s, you know, three days long, plus travel, that’s five days, that’s a week. And then let’s say I get sick, that’s two weeks. I need to be able to justify the financial return on investment of having two weeks out of my business. Now, that’s not to say I don’t speak anywhere.

I do, but I really prioritize speaking engagements where I’m either getting paid an amount that makes sense for me, and that can be different. It can be that it justifies me being out of the office for a full week, potentially getting sick. It can be that I’m already going to that place, so it makes more sense even if it’s unpaid. It’s just that it really needs to make sense. And I noticed when I was having conversations with people, there was like a little part of me that wanted to chase the ego, you know, the, oh, I want to show up on this stage and this stage, and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that. And it’s not Just motivated by ego. But for me, it would be because the return on investment isn’t there as much as it is and other things that I could be doing. So what I really learned from this is that not only is it okay for me to be like, yeah, no, you do you that that’s not what I want to do, and that’s fine, no judgment, but that just because something looks impressive or prestigious from the outside doesn’t necessarily mean it’s the best use of your time and your energy. I have prioritized much more this year. Traveling to be with my mastermind that I’m, you know, like a paying client of, that has generated so much more return on investment for me than I would be able to generate by, you know, traveling to speak at Wedding MBA or to speak at Engage. Like, those things just historically have not had a enough of a return on investment.

Don’t get me wrong, they’re fun. I love going and hanging out with industry people, but I can’t justify the ROI of it, and I don’t want to do it enough, quite frankly. If I really wanted to do it, I’m sure, you know, I could justify it. But if it’s like, I already kind of don’t want to do this, I’m a very cozy person. I like sleeping in my own bed. I like my creature comforts. It’s not a place I was already planning on going or already want to go. It’s not gonna generate an ROI. I would simply be doing this to make myself feel important, and that’s not a good enough reason. So I’ve gotten more comfortable in making that decision this year. Another one. This is one that I have to relearn. I swear. This is one that I have to learn, like, every day of my life. Small moves create big change. This is uncomfortable for me, but it is really, really important.

Small, simple moves, sometimes like 10 minute steps, 15 minute steps, things that take under an hour, often create the biggest impact, even though that doesn’t logically make a ton of sense. And I instinctively resist this. I want things to feel meaningful. I want them to feel big. And sometimes that makes me overlook the simple changes that actually do the most. It’s almost like I feel like I’m cheating. I feel like it’s too easy. And the truth is, the things that have really changed my business the most this year did not feel big. They didn’t feel dramatic. They didn’t feel impactful. They felt kind of boring, quite frankly. And that’s something I keep having to remind myself of that.

The most important thing I can do today, this week, this month, is usually something small and boring. And it’s usually something like small, repetitive, and boring. But it drives results. So I have to keep reminding myself and quiet that part of my brain. It’s like, yeah, but why don’t we go over here and do all this other stuff that feels really big and feels really exciting? It’s like, yeah, that’s not what I’m trying to get out of my business. I’m not trying to get excitement. I like when things are boring because that means that they work right. And sometimes these small, repeatable things, they don’t feel like you’re doing enough.

I’m actually in an SEO program right now, and I mentioned on one of our group Q and A calls, you know, we figured out some parts of the strategy, and all I needed to do was go plug in these, like, page titles and make these super small changes. And I was like, this doesn’t feel like enough. And I don’t know what that is. I don’t know if it’s just like we feel like we have to put big effort in to get big results, but usually the opposite is true. And it’s really weird. And I don’t know if I will ever get to a point where that will become second nature. Reminding myself has become second nature, which I love, because now I’m staying so super focused on those small things that make big changes. But it’s weird, man. Small tasks, driving, like a small thing that knocks over a big domino does not make logical sense in our brains. And it’s really hard to get yourself to think in that way. At least it is for me.

Another lesson is that AI needs strategy. AI came up a lot this year. I’ve been using a lot of AI. I’ve been really enjoying it. And I’ve created different AI tools for members of The Wedding Business Collective. And it has saved me a ton of time. And it’s great. But AI really works best when you’re coming to it, knowing what you want out of it, knowing what the strategy is, because ultimately it’s just a tool. You need to know what you want it to do and why you’re using it. And what you want to accomplish with also has to understand your voice and your business, or it’s just going to create fluff. It’s going to create stuff that sounds like everybody else. And it’s really interesting because my coach says, like, you have to love AI and hate AI at the same time. We have to hold these. Both of these things to be true in our brains. And it’s weird because of the cognitive dissonance of that, but it’s. It’s where we’re at.

We have to resist some of the things that it will turn out for us. I don’t have to love the impacts in some ways and what these people are doing, who are running these companies, and it really can be amazing. Like, it has really helped me enhance and support my own thinking and problem solving. And it can be sycophantic, that’s for sure. But it has really helped with that because I am very much an external processor, and this helps me do it with myself, which is really, really cool. But I think a lot of people see it as, like, this shiny object and this thing that’s going to change their business. It’s going to save them so much time. And it can. But it’s like any other tool, right? It’s like a drill. It’s like a hammer.

You have to know what you’re gonna do with it in order to get the results out of it. Otherwise, like, it’s just a toolbox. Like, it’s gonna add more clutter. So that’s been interesting to see. Something else I learned this year is that I need to track metrics with purpose and accountability. I have this aversion to tracking things when I don’t have a clear purpose. Like, I know people that are so good at, you know, logging into their tool or logging into their spreadsheet and tracking things, and they’re super good with their data. Too much structure and arbitrary rules. Like, my brain just kind of shuts down. I don’t know what it is. I’ve always been kind of resistant in fighting my own rules. It’s this very weird thing that I’ve had to learn to work around. So when tracking feels pointless, really, when anything in my business feels pointless, I avoid it. But I’ve learned that when tracking metrics, or looking at metrics, or analyzing in some way, just looking at my data is tied to a specific goal. I am all in. If I can see how this gets me from point A to point B, I am so in. And I’m excited about it. And I’ve learned that the purpose behind it really matters more than the process. And I have to keep that in mind.

I know people that are so meticulous with tracking their data, and that’s not me. I learned that I can get the same results by, you know, instead of tracking the Webinar that I’m running on a daily basis with like, registrations and things like that. I do better when I track it on a weekly basis because I will be so resistant to doing it on a daily basis. I also learned how much external accountability really helps me. A friend in my mastermind who is like this data genius, I was talking to her about this and she was like, okay, well, I’m going to be your accountability partner on this. I want you to message me on this day of the week and tell me what these particular metrics are for this week in your business. And that one change made. Looking at my data tracking metrics feel useful instead of draining because they were informing a conversation. And that was really interesting to see how that switch kind of happened in my brain.

I also very much need the right kind of structure. This has been an ongoing, I think it is for all of us, like learning how to manage yourself. You’re always learning new things about yourself and how to manage yourself. This year was the first time when I signed up for a course or a group program or, you know, anything like that, support for a project, whatever it is. I. The first thing I did, I went and I scheduled out blocks of time, not just for the calls. That’s what I’ve done in the past. You know, we’re doing coaching calls every Tuesday at 1pm or something like that. This time I scheduled out blocks to implement from those programs. And what that meant is I had a space on my calendar that was carved out, I think, like, for the SEO program I’m in, I think I carved out like three hours every Friday. And that is my time to go implement the things I need to do in that program. And that was really important to me because, like a lot of people, I have a tendency to learn.

I love learning so much, but it’s very easy for me to not implement. So I have to make sure that I’m connecting the learning and the implementing and just simply by scheduling those blocks in my calendar. I know, okay, on Friday afternoon, that’s my time to go and implement. For this particular program, it could be for a course, it could be anything. But by naming that space on my calendar, I have implemented so much faster and so much easier, and I have felt less overwhelmed and much more in control, which I absolutely love. So I would highly recommend that if you are in any sort of course or membership or you’re going through any kinds of training, anything like that, don’t just put the call times, don’t just Put the meetings in your calendar, put the implementation time in your calendar, because that is missing for a lot of people. I know I’m not alone there. All right, so that was my business. I was surprised how closely my lessons matched what I saw from my clients this year. Plans definitely create momentum.

I noticed more than ever this year, clients who followed a clear plan for themselves, like we do in our 90 day planning workshops that we do inside The Wedding Business Collective, they made faster progress and they felt less overwhelmed. They felt so accomplished and it was so doable. And it’s because the plan removes second guessing. You make all of the decisions up front when you’re in CEO mode and then you can just show up and do the work. They weren’t asking themselves what to do next every single day. That’s like the worst case scenario for me is to sit down at my laptop and not know what I’m supposed to be doing. Because past CEO me needs to have given me my assignment or, you know, given me the work orders to go implement. And what that allows you to do is just follow the next step. And it freed up so much mental space for so many members of The Wedding Business Collective.

So that was really cool to see. This year more than ever, standing out has been like the number one thing. And I’ve heard from so many wedding professionals that like, they’ve gotten fewer inquiries this year. Things have dropped off. And what I’m seeing overall is that businesses that clearly stand out and make it so super clear why you should hire them instead of someone else, why you should work with this planner instead of another planner, this photographer instead of another photographer. It needs to be so crystal clear. I talk about it in a challenge I host. I talk about it in The wedding Business Collective as passing the five second test. You’ve got five seconds.

When someone lands on your website, they need to understand who you’re the go to person for and if they’re in the right place. If they are, great, if not also great because you’re qualifying them. And I saw this really come up as a struggle. People more than ever, couples more than ever are looking for. I want the right solution to my problem. And historically, wedding professionals don’t think in problem solution type ways of thinking that marketers do, that copywriters do. And I saw time and time and time again with wedding pros and The Wedding Business Collective when we really nailed down who they were a perfect fit for, and we communicated that in their marketing, they started booking up like crazy because people finally understood why you, if Someone you know lands on a website, if they read an email, if they see a social media post, and they can’t immediately tell what makes your business different, they move on. And that’s happening faster than ever. So clarity in standing out became a real competitive advantage this year.

Another thing that came up over and over again and really has for years. But this year especially, standing out is no longer negotiable, and price transparency is no longer negotiable. It mattered more this year than ever before. It will continue to matter. We are currently in a time where several different things are happening. And I’ve talked about this before, I’m sure this is nothing new to you, but we are in a time where our clients are now becoming Gen Z who have grown up looking for things in a certain way, shopping in a certain way. And the price transparency smarminess that has happened so much in the wedding industry, like this weird cloak and dagger game that so many wedding businesses have played, people are just like, no, thanks. I just. I’m not even gonna contact you. I’m not even gonna ask.

So it used to be like, why do they only ask about price? Because you’re withholding that and you’re not giving them any information about if they’re a fit or not. And now it’s. They’re just not hearing. Because why would people spend their time when you’re not doing the work to show them that they are the best fit. I saw this work, even for higher price and more luxury businesses that have pushed back historically. I’ve had clients this year who resisted and kind of fought me on this. And they were convinced that it was going to scare people away. And don’t get me wrong, there’s a right and a wrong way to communicate pricing. You can’t just slap a price because nobody knows what that means and what they get for that price. Like, is $10,000 a lot of money?

I don’t know. For a wedding venue, For a weekend? No. For a sandwich? Yes. Like, the context matters. But what I saw over and over again, every single person who pushed back on this, and I understand why they did it, but every single one, when they tested clearer pricing or starting points or a price range or setting a clear price, they got better leads, they got more leads, they got fewer frustrating inquiries. And that transparency built trust faster. And I have had people this year tell me that they have had inquiries that have come to them and said, thank you so much for publishing your pricing on your website.I

t made it so much easier to choose you because Every other website I came across didn’t have any information or they wouldn’t give me that information. People can’t make a buying decision if they don’t know the price of something. And yes, this also applies to higher priced products and services. I’m not saying just slap a price on your website. You need to clearly communicate that you need copy on your service page that says sells so that price feels like a deal. But it’s a non negotiable now and it builds trust. We are absolutely in a trust recession. I know you’ve heard that a million times and I hate saying it because it’s so cliche at this point, but it’s true. You know, we really need to make sure we’re building trust. People don’t buy when they don’t feel safe, so we need to make them feel safe. Another pattern I saw this year is people constantly overlook relationships and referrals and jump straight to social media.

So in The Wedding Business Collective, members go through a process of building their overwhelm squashing marketing plan. And when they get to the end of it, they have a fully fleshed out marketing plan. They know exactly who they’re talking to, they know exactly what to say in order to get them to book, they know exactly where and how to market and they can submit that marketing plan for me. I can’t tell you how many times this year I was reviewing marketing plans and I was like, you don’t have anything on here for relationships and referrals. Relationships really fuel bookings in our industry and most people don’t really know what to do in order to build and maintain those relationships. They just kind of fall off. And that’s why I created an app called Referral Rhythm.

I will link to it in the show notes. It is a tool to help you keep track of, manage and just immediately know what step to take in order to nurture those relationships. You don’t even really have to think about it, really investing in your relationships, reconnecting with people that you already know that already like you, that already trust you, that have worked with you before. There is so much business to be had there and it gets overlooked for social media, which is really interesting to me and I kind of get it because social media is like outward facing. We can see what everybody else is doing, we can’t see the relationship work anyone else is doing. But when we focus on social media, we put our eggs in this basket. That is often a much longer play than people realize.

I think a lot of people think they’re going to start posting on social media and they’re just going to start booking. And that almost never happens. I’ve seen it a few times, but it almost never happens. Your fastest path to more bookings is almost always through relationships. And that’s why we emphasize it so much in The Wedding Business Collective. It’s why we have refer playbooks to help you take action on getting more referrals. It’s why we have referral rhythm as a tool. Now available members of The Wedding Business Collective get access for free. You can get access for five bucks a month. I wanted to make it super easy and a no-brainer for you as a way to manage these relationships. Know exactly who to check in with and what to do, because that what to do piece is really confusing for a lot of people. So one that showed up for me and my clients is that small actions feel insignificant, but they work. Those small actions, those little things, they create real momentum, especially when things feel slow.

And the tricky part is it rarely feels like you’re doing anything important when you’re doing them. This disconnect really trips people up. And I get it, it trips me up. Sometimes. People really struggle to let things be simple and take small, calculated steps toward their goal. That, like, let it be simple has been a mantra that has come up time and time again this year in The Wedding Business Collective. This is something that I remind my clients of constantly, and it’s something I have to remind myself of as well, because it’s not the easiest thing. We think we need this big new shiny thing and we almost never do. So looking back on this year, the biggest takeaway for me is that progress and achieving my goals didn’t come from doing more. It came from choosing better, more aligned options, from trusting simple steps.

Even if I have to remind myself of that on a daily basis, that’s okay. From following a plan and from really focusing on what worked, I am such a big proponent of can we just let things be easy and do more of what works and less of what doesn’t? So many people like, they see something not working and they throw themselves fully into that and it’s like, yeah, okay, what if you put like 10% of that energy into referrals? You would get way more business out of it than spending, you know, a full day each week on Instagram that’s not working for you or whatever it is.

Really. This year, it has underscored the fact that sometimes the simplest path really is the one that works. And even though it may feel weird it may feel like cheating, it may not feel like you’re doing enough. You are allowed to take that and that is the smartest and best path to take. So as you’re heading into a new season, I hope this episode helps ground you and remind you that you don’t need to overhaul everything to move forward. You can take this simple path. You can make things easier for yourself and get better results in the process.

All right my friend, I will link to everything I mentioned here in the show notes at evolveyourweddingbusiness.com/342. I would love to hear from you. Did any of these lessons really resonate for you or give you ideas that you can implement for yourself? I’d love to hear from you on Instagram. Send me a dm. I genuinely love hearing from listeners. I love talking about this stuff. So I am @evolveyourweddingbusiness over there. I hope to hear from you and I will speak to you again very soon.